I went running (jogging, huffing and puffing is more like it) this morning. This triathlon is coming up quickly and I know I simply need to get out there and run as often as possible. I did 20 minutes an only walked once at the 10 minute mark, and I was really excited to do that.
I was a tad shocked, however, to hear the crazy negative self talk that I created on the way home. It sounds ironic- I want to get better at running, yet I really don’t want to put in the time necessary to get better. I think to myself that I’m simply not going to get better, that I’m better off not putting in the time and effort. I count the months between now and planned- for triathlon (2-3) and I dread having to run for those months.
Then I finish, take a hot shower and I’m fine. Sore, excited to have completed it, but not yet looking forward to another run. I have been wondering about this negative self talk all day and I think it stems from the fact that running is a challenge for me, and always has been. I would describe myself as athletic, and most sports have come quite easily to me. So why would I ever choose a sport that doesn’t come easily to me when others are a-ok? Part of it is a challenge, and part of it is because I have to. Honestly, if I could choose to play water polo, row, or ride a horse as the third leg of the triathlon, I would sign right up. But alas, I’ll do what I need to do. And I’ll try to think of it in an optimistic light, but I’m not making any promises!!